Archive for the Uncategorized Category

Hmong Pepper Sauce

Posted in Uncategorized on November 4, 2008 by cthao4

hmong pepper sauce

Hmong people cannot live without pepper sauce. Hmong Pepper Sauce is essentially a part of every meal including breakfast, lunch, and dinner. While other Asians cultures consume and enjoy pepper sauce, for the Hmong, life isn’t life without pepper sauce.

Hmong Pepper Sauce is a simple dip mainly used for meat, but can be used for anything else. The main ingredients are chopped cilantro, chopped baby-onion stalks, fish sauce, and fresh or dried Thai peppers, all mixed into a pepper-bowl.

            Traditionally the Hmong people in poverty began to eat rice-in-water along with the main course, “hot pepper.” It was all the food that could be afforded. As livestock and agriculture grew, Hmong people just couldn’t give up the appetite of pepper sauce. It reminded the Hmong, how they suffered and how the Hmong overcame such hunger struggle. Pepper sauce became a symbol of the Hmong people.

Today, the Hmong people are the only ones who eat hot pepper sauce with every meal. Wake up in the morning and eat rice, eggs, sausages, and hot pepper sauce. During afternoon, a bowl of curry noodles is put on the table and yes, hot pepper sauce is poured into the curry noodles. Lastly for dinner: boiled chicken and rice, and again, hot pepper sauce for flavor (June Chua).

In the long run, the Hmong without Hmong Pepper Sauce is like Batman without Robin or Ernie without Burt. If you really want to know if someone is Hmong, just observe what they eat with every meal, and if it’s Hmong Pepper Sauce, most likely they are Hmong.

 

Hmong Knife

Posted in Uncategorized on November 4, 2008 by cthao4

Is there such a tool that could easily be used for butching meat as well as peeling the skin of an apple, while at the same time be used as a fork, a screwdriver, a hammer, a lawnmower, or a pencil sharpener? How about self-defense, a can opener, a measuring gadget, or anything else anyone can think of? The answer is YES! There is such a thing called the “Hmong Knife.” Every Hmong family owns a “Hmong Knife.”

 

The Hmong Knife is a traditional and spiritual knife used by the elder Hmong generations. The front section of the blade is mainly used for cutting, and the bulging-part of the blade is mainly used for chopping and butchering.

This isn’t the typical Whiteman’s knife where each individual blade is designed for a specialized cut. Need to kill a pig for a ritual? No problem. Use the Hmong Knife to puncture a hole in the pig’s throat to kill the pig. Use the Hmong Knife to scrap off the pig’s hair. Use the Hmong Knife to cut out the pig’s organs. Use the Hmong Knife to butcher the pig into pieces. Use the Hmong Knife to remove bone from meat. Use the Hmong Knife to…, well you get the idea. How many knives do Hmong people use to kill a pig? JUST ONE. How many knives do the White people use to kill a pig? At least four including the razor knife, the carver knife, the butcher knife, and the boning knife.

Now, the spiritual aspect of the Hmong Knife is what makes the Hmong Knife different. The Hmong Knife is a designated instrument used to ward off evil spirits (Hmong Cultural Tour). Simply place the Hmong Knife under your pillow to forget those nasty nightmares. Or place the Hmong Knife by the doors to prevent evil spirits from entering.

The Hmong Knife is so legendary that it may be considered to be in the same class as Yamato-Dake’s Kusanagi sword from Japan’s history or even King Arthur’s Excalibur from Britain history. If you don’t agree, I suggest that you buy a Hmong Knife as soon as possible. Don’t know where to buy one? Ask a Hmong person.

 

 

 

Links Must Check Out:

 

 

 

Watermelons

Posted in Uncategorized on November 4, 2008 by cthao4

Hmong people love to eat watermelons during the summer. Hmong people would purchase 6-15 watermelons per visit at the supermarket and they would also visit the supermarket as soon as they ran out of watermelons. They know the days when watermelons are to be restocked. They know the best prices for a watermelon. They know everything to know about watermelons.

What is this drive that causes the Hmong people to buy so many watermelons during the summer time? For the common reasons, it taste good and it quenches your thirst. Furthermore, Hmong people enjoy the health benefits of watermelon (the World’s Healthiest Foods and PubMed Central).

Another reason why Hmong people buy so many watermelons is because of their huge family size. Hmong families average about 6-9 children per household. In order for each family member to have a rational amount of watermelon for good health, about 2 ½ watermelons would be served to each family member. Before you know it, no more watermelons!

Did I forget to mention that watermelons are called watermelons for a reason? Yes they contain a lot of WATER, which means the human plumbing system needs to be flushed more frequently. For a Hmong person after eating 2 ½ watermelons, every five minutes up to thirty minutes will be devoted to the bathroom. Because lines to the bathroom will be long, it’s normal that some Hmong people have “their accidents” in their pants.

Overall this means bad news for the supermarkets. They will always run out of watermelons. How to counter this kind of watermelon devastation? 1) Plan early: know when the new stock of watermelon is coming to the supermarket. 2) Have Money: start saving money from your previous paychecks (credit cards are possible, but not recommended). 3) Action: after watermelons are restocked, buy as many watermelons as humanly possible. Remember to be aggressive because you’ll know when you see a Hmong.

Hmong People in the News

Posted in Uncategorized on November 4, 2008 by cthao4

What kind of news do people really want? Some people like to read about War and Terrorism, others like bad weather, man-made and natural disasters and crime. Then there’s some who like politics and sports. Overall, it depends on what the person themselves likes to read. Americans would like to hear about money because the American economy is not doing very well, so Americans like to read about the status of money in their country. For the Hmong people it’s simple: as long as anything associated with the Hmong that makes the headline news.

            In 2005, Chai Vang was convicted of murdering six hunters and wounding two others on the second day of the deer season (Niskanen). However the Hmong people’s true response was quite unordinary despite how mournful the event may have been. The response is always screaming, “Hmong People! Hmong People on TV!” jumping with excitement while maintaining one finger pointed at the television. The rest of the family comes in rushing wondering about the commotion. They too, scream aloud, “Hmong People! Hmong People on TV!” in excitement with their fingers pointed at the television.

White people don’t jump up in excitement exclaiming, “White People! White People!” especially during the Jeffrey Dahmer incident and the Black people don’t jump in excitement exclaiming, “Black People! Black People!” during the O.J. Simpson trial either.

The major reason why Hmong people behave this way is because Hmong people rarely make the headline news. So when you hear someone screaming, “Hmong People! Hmong People!” and pointing towards someone/something pertaining to Hmong people; mostly likely that someone is Hmong.

Propane Gas Stoves

Posted in Uncategorized on November 3, 2008 by cthao4

           

Normally in a garage we would think we would find a parked vehicle, hardware and hardware tools, housing exteriors, and maybe some bicycles and of that sort. This is not the case, if you are Hmong. What exactly do we find in a Hmong person’s garage? A milestone of propane gas stoves.

img_04215Hmong people are defined by how many propane gas stoves they own. Normally the average Whiteman may own just one propane gas stove mainly used for family camping and recreational purposes.

However the Hmong people’s ideal of propane gas stove are a lot different. Propane gas stoves are used for mass social gathering such as traditional rituals and celebrations. These mass social gatherings can be anywhere from 50 to 200 people and occur every other week. Occasionally, the Hmong people would notice, “OMG! What have we done to our precious kitchen stoves?” Then Mr. Propane Gas Stove would swoop in with his cape and say, “Looks like somebody could use a hand,” in a very heroic manner. The Hmong people would praise and idolize Mr. Propane Gas Stove. Now the Hmong people could steam their rice; boil their chicken, pork, and beef; and fry their eggrolls for everyone without having to destroy their kitchen stoves.

Propane gas stove didn’t just make it easier for Hmong people to cook for mass social gatherings; propane gas stove also solved the problem of the stink that would permeate the rest of the house. Propane gas stove can be used in the basement, garage, or anywhere outside (InformeDesign).

In theory: the number of propane gas stoves owned equals how much Hmong an individual is.

# of propane gas stove own

Hmong Meter

0-1

Not a Hmong

2-3

Probably a Hmong

4-5

Absolutely a Hmong

The table shows the relationship of the theory mentioned above. Most Hmong people own 2-3 propane gas stoves which definitely correlate to the Hmong Meter quite well.

If you ever wonder if someone is Hmong, ask how many propane gas stoves that person owns. Or simply have a peek in that person’s garage and use the Hmong Meter to determine if that person is Hmong.

 

 

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